Taking One Step at a Time
by fujinakaheero
Summary: A look inside of Eiri Yuki's thoughts as events happen in his life. MAJOR SPOILERS! 'Tis a YukixShuichi fic. This is set right from the beginning of the animemanga to right after the anime I only used the manga up to half of the 5th one Not for younger ki


**A/N:** Hello everyone! Well, this is my first Gravitation fic. I'm glad that I finally got around to writing one and I hope you liked reading this. This story does follow very closely to the manga and the anime. It'll follow a lot more with the anime since I've only read up to half of the 5th manga. This is Yuki's mind and what he thinks as the events roll around. There's also extra parts that is not shown in the show/manga. There are quite a few spoilers in here so read at your risk and don't flame me telling me I didn't warn you. Anyways hope you like! Remember R&R, authors like when you do that.

**DISCLAIMER:** I don't own Gravitation or any of the characters, I am simply just writing about it. I do not get paid for doing this so do not bother me.

**Taking One Step at a Time**

YUKI'S POV

_I know there's something in the wake of your smile.  
I get a notion from the look in your eyes, yea.  
You've built a love but that love falls apart.  
Your little piece of heaven turns too dark. _

It had been just like any other day. I had gone to meet my publisher to tell her when my next book would be done. I only had one chapter left to write and then it would be off to the editors. Who'd have known that that night I would have met my match? It was that night that the wind blew alittle stronger then usual. It had been that wind that caused our meeting for that wind is what blew your lyrics out of your hand. I was the one to catch them and as I read them I had thought someone very young had written them since they really were crap. I looked up to see you running my way and as I saw you looking around the park I knew that these belongs to you. I spoke to you then as you came closer.

"Did you write these?" I wanted to smirk then as you looked at me with those bright, wide, innocence violet eyes. It had been so different to see that shade of eye colour, though I never told you that. You stuttered as you answered me, I wanted to laugh at you then and there.

"Uh..umm.. well, yeah." Who'd have thought that after this meeting things would evolve into a greater deal.

"It's below the level of grade school student. You're making such a big deal over one strong sentence. Do you think this grade of love song writing would even sell?" I started to walk by him, holding out his piece of paper that held his lyrics. When he grabbed them and I passed by I stopped by his side. "You have zero talent." With those words I left you, going back to my apartment where no one could bother me.

It was now almost a week later since we had met in the park. You had moved in with me, yet you barely knew me. It seemed I knew more about you then you did with me. I had already claimed you as my own when I came to your house after you got sick. You said I had raped you yet you had gone willingly only shortly after. I knew that you were falling for me as we laid in our bed that night yet I blocked out anything that would let me fall for you as well. I can't trust you, not like I had trusted _him_ if I did gods know what may happen. I looked down at your sleeping face and saw a smile play on your lips. I swiped a stray piece of hair away from your face. It was always wonder how you were able to feel half of the emotions you did and each time I looked in your eyes I could always tell exactly what you were feeling. I shook my head, trying to clear my head and get some sleep.

I knew I would not be able to sleep though, so I had decided to get a magazine that laid on my floor that you had bought that day. I noticed that you and I were on the front cover. I knew you were rising in fame as was I with the lady population. As I opened it and looked at the article that had both you and I in it I noticed then that the press were now saying that you and I were a couple. I narrowed my eyes at this. I lit a cigarette. By tomorrow it'll be one week. Goodbye Shuichi-kun. I blew a puff of smoke out before leaving to my study room, leaving Shuichi alone by himself in our bed. When had I started saying our bed? It was _my_ bed, there was no _us_. 

_Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.  
Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.  
I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye. _

That morning I had all his stuff packed up already. You stood behind the bags and looked at me with those bright big violet eyes. I looked away as I spoke to you. I knew that if I looked you directly in the eye my nerves would falter slightly.

"We were pretend lovers and now it's over." I said coldly to him.

"Why? Are you mad at me Yuki?" He asks, his voice faltering as tears prick his eyes.

"That too. You easily cry, have a loud voice, and to make matters worse, you suck in bed." Tears start to stream down his cheeks as I speak in my cold tone.

I-I'm sorry Yuki. I can try harder next time! I can do better-" He cries out

"-And you're gay." I say, ignoring him as he speaks.

"I-I am not gay! I like girls, Yuki is a guy, but..but.."

"Shut up already, you're giving me a headache. I'm not going to sugar coat this for you. What I really hate is you." He crumbles to his knees then, covering his face with his heads, crying into them. My heart gives a slight tug but my resolve is still there. I'm not going to let it get to me. I had said a week and it was a week already. A voice popped up in my head then. 'You shoudl give him a chance before you say _goodbye_ to him.' I ignore it and wait for him to leave. He looks back at me before he shuts the door, tears still streaming his beautiful face.

I walked back to my study room where my labtop was. Wanting nothing more then to get my mind off of things that had just happened. I didn't know where he was going to go now and I told myself that I didn't care.. yet my heart gave a tug and I felt like butterflies were fluttering around in my stomache. What if something were to happen to him wherever her went? He'd probably go back home with his family or go back to that guys home, I think his name was Hiroshi, or something like that. I knew they went to school together and played music together so I could care less if he went to him. Yet I wondered if that meeting with him that one night would come back and bite me in the ass. I guess I won't find out until it does.

__

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile.  
The precious moments are all lost in the tide, yea.  
They're swept away and nothing is what is seems,  
the feeling of belonging to your dreams.  


I had gone out that night, I had went to bar to get a few drinks and meet my editor to see what she had done to my novel. I drove back to my apartment and parked my car in the garage. As I stepped out of my car a light that was infront of my car shone. I squinted my eyes to see who was standing next to it.

"In order to protect you, last night Shuichi had to do tricks for Taki Aizawa of ASK." His fist shook slightly as the man looked at me. "Excellent poker face. So you gonna let him get away with it then? Why? Why did you break it off before Shuichi got serious? Why didn't you just cut it off?" He walked up to me, rage clearly shinning in his eyes as he grabbed the front of my suit. "You're the worst! So now you want to say goodbye to Shuichi? I'm through with your games!" My eyes narrowed. I grabbed his wrist that was holding me in an almost death grip, making him let go of me.

"So.. in other words, it's to late to turn back now, right?" My eyes held a deathly cold glare as I spoke now. "Taki Aizawa of ASK, where can I find him?" Hiro looked at me, eyes wide now. He was not looking into the eyes of a writer now, but instead looking into the eyes of a killer.

As I had drove to the building where the guy was I reflected on a lot of things, for insistance, the fact that someone had harmed _my _Shuichi. It had happened to him. How could I have let this happen?

After arriving at the building everything felt so surreal, so much like a dream. After Shuichi had found me and I had saw what he was wearing. He chased after me and just as he caught up to me he had fainted.

We had made love that night, before I left. I had finally realized that he was better off without me.

_  
Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.  
Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.  
I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye. _

Who'd have thought though? The little brat had found where I am, no thanks to Tatshua. Never let two brats be together at once. I had told him then what I had done in my past, hoping it would push him far enough away from me, hoping that he'd hate me and just leave me alone. Yet fate was against me. Would he ever just go. Doesn't he see that, really in the end it wouldn't work out, that I would hurt him just like _he _hurt me? I don't think I would be able to to handle such a thing. Was I falling for the brat? No, I couldn't be. Why can't I just push him away? Why can't he just take the hint and leave? What keeps him going? My head starts to ache slightly and I feel the on set of another headache forming. I hate when they come like this.

We drive back to my house that night. My head still slightly throbbing from the headache I got. I look over to see Shuichi sleeping in the passenger seat. I look back at the road, many different thoughts running through my head. Why had I really run away? I already knew the answer to that question. I thought that if I left Shuichi wouldn't get hurt anymore. Figures he wouldn't give up on me that easily though. Maybe I really was just afraid of falling for the brat. Was I the one who was afraid of getting hurt again? Was I just being selfish? Maybe... so why did I care so much about the man next to me then? Could it be that I was already falling for him? I rubbed my left temple in an atempt to calm my thoughts.

_And there are voices  
that want to be heard.  
So much to mention  
but you can't find the words.  
The scent of magic,  
the beauty that's been  
when love was wilder than the wind._

I watched as Shuichi ran around the house, making sure everything was clean and that supper was ordered at the right time. I on the other hand sat on the couch letting my thoughts over take my mind. I now blamed myself for what happened to him, I blamed myself for making his eyes as my own, I blamed myself for ever stepping into his life and letting him come into mine. I felt as if I wanted to cry, something I haven't done in almost five years now. Who'd have thought something like this would cause such trouble? I closed my eyes and let my mind drift to the dream world. _  
_

I narrowed my eyes at the man who stood infront of me, Aizawa. Figures, the man would come back for revenge because of what I did to his little friend. I laugh slightly as he tries to threaten me. Who did this man think he was? Did he really think he had power over me? If only he knew that knowing and being in business with Tohma would not help him, due to the fact that I was his brother-in-law. The man spit out nice words, some even about my past. Did he really think that black mailing me with this would work? What an idiot.

I looked over as I heard a loud crash come through my wall. I narrow my eyes now at the brat who has now appeared from the hole that was now in _my_ wall. I could have strangled him right then and there for is stupidity.

"Oi, brat! What the hell were you thinking? Why didn't you use the door?" He looks over to me and then to Aizawa and narrows his eyes at the man.

"I see, had to get your lover boy to help you out?" Taki smirks at me and I want to smack it off of him. Shuichi takes this moment to kick him and then start to shake him, saying crap that I didn't feel like hearing.

"Stupid lazy eye! How dare you try to hurt my Yuki!"

"Shuichi get off of him. We were just talking." Shuichi looks at me and gets off of him.

"You know, you really are pathetic. Trying to black mail me like this just so I'll stop singing."

Taki takes this moment to run to the door, before leaving he had to say his closing lines. A drama is never good without closing lines after all.

"Shut..shut the fuck up!" I almost want to smirk at this, watching him run away liket he coward he is. I look over to Shuichi who now has his eyes upon me, worry clear in his eyes.

"Y-Yuki, are you ok? Not at all? Is it because of what I said to him? Did I say something wrong to him?" I want to smack him. How could he worry about me? He was the one hurting, he was the one that was hurt by that man! How could he ask me if I was ok?

"Something like that, you're right." I say quietly.

"Eh?" He turns questioning eyes to me now. He thinks about things for a moment and then looks back at my face. "My stupid bad habit..what did you expect at this hour? I was worried about you..."

"It's my fault. I remembered.. it's all my fault. You.." I can fell the tears start to build. Who is this? This not me, I do not cry! Why am I crying...

"Yuki... what's wrong?" He moves closer to my face, trying to get a look at it, as I try to hide my pain, my suffering.

"Your eyes are the same as mine because..." he jumps back as he sees my tears falling down my cheeks. I must be scaring him. For him to see this weak side of me, something he's never seen before. I've always been strong... that or I just had everything packed down.

"Y-you're crying!" He looks scared now as he looks down at me. "Yu-Yu-Yu-Yuki! Is it something I said-"

"-I really wanted to be with you.." I fell the tears falling even more. Is this how I have been feeling this whole time? My chest is swelling... my heart is aching. I feel as if my emotions are going to overwhelm me, consume my whole being.

"Wh-what are you talking about! Yuki you're scaring me!" I couldn't hear what he was saying anymore, the need to speak was overwhelming me.

"..but I can't.. I couldn't remember it. What if I do remember? I'll betray you again for sure. I can't take it anymore. I'm so sorry." I rub my eyes, trying to clear my vision a little. "I don't ever want to go back.. to killing." I say, the last of my walls crumbling as I cry my heart out to the man next to me... my lover. I lay my head onto his lap as he holds me. Trying to comfort me as best he can. I feel his hands stroke my hair as I sob lightly into his lap. Feeling the need to get all of this out of me so I wouldn't do it again.

_Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.  
Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.  
I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye. _

I squeezed my eyes shut asShuichi kept going on and trying to comfort me. It was getting to be very annoying. Did this brat ever shut up? I felt him stroke my head.

"Shut up. Your voice is irratating." He stopped what he was doing as I said this.

"What? I've been saying really embarassing things to make you feel better and this is what you say to me?"

"Just shut up already. I haven't cried for five years and I'm getting a headache." My voice is still muffled by the couch as I keep my head down to block out the light.

"Ahh! Five years? Really? I cry atleast once a day. You're so cool Yuki!" He went on rambling non sense as I looked up and watched him. A smile played on my lips as I watched him laugh at himself. How could one person be so full of energy? So full of life? Even after going through that crap with Aizawa he still went on living life just as he had before it happened. How did he do it?

I patted his head as he started talking about how much loved strawberry pockie. He stopped midway between his sentence and looked over at me. I smile at him and he grins like an idiot back at me. I think he liked the attention he got when I gave it to him. I saw him give a yawn and I figured that it was time for bed. I stood up, holding my hand out to Shuichi. I lead him to our bedroom and shut the door behind us. I start to strip off my clothes as I hear him jump into the bed.

"Yuki, does it bother you that the press knows about our relationship? Do I bother you Yuki?" I look over at him as he lays on the bed, arms folded behind his head and eyes closed. I feel bad now. I know I'm mean to him, the only reason I am is because I want to push him away, I didn't want him to hurt me, I wouldn't be able to handle it, yet at the sametime I never want to let him go.

I get into bed beside him and put and arm around his waist. I kiss him temple before I answer. "No shu-chan, it doesn't bother me that the press knows about us. You really don't bother me either, I just.. am not use to someone loving me the way you do." This is one of the moments in my life where my being is left unguarded by that wall I put around it.

"Oh." He turns around to face me now. "Do you think you'll ever love me like I love you, Yuki?" I feel that my heart starts to race slightly. Could I love him like he loves me? I think I'm already falling for him.. but could I tell him that?

I tighten my hold him slighty. "Maybe, Shu-chan, maybe one day." I lift his head to mine and kiss him, silencing him from questioning me any further on anything. I feel him give up any resistance he may have had and kisses me back with the same amount of passion. My hands roam his body slowly. I rub his back slowly and let my hand wonder slowly down to his butt, grasping each globe in my palms. He gasps slightly, allowing me slip my tounge into his mouth. A war breaks out between his tounge and my own and I can feel myself start to harden as he pushes his body flush against my own.

I break away from him, panting softly as I hook a thumb into his boxers, tugging them down slightly though it's hard as he is still lying on his side. I sat up and pushed him into his back. I hooked both of my thumbs in his boxers and pull them down with his help. I smile slightly upon seeing that he was standing a full attention, my own member started to strain against my boxers. I licked my lips as I looked at his naked body that was exposed to my gaze. I kneel over him and nudge his legs apart with my own leg. I slide inbetween his legs and slide back up to kiss his lips again. He moans and shudders slightly as our members rub against one anothers. I slip my tounge into his mouth briefly before breaking away and move down to his neck, nipping and licking the soft flesh exposed to me. He moaned alittle louder this time and thrusted his hips slightly to gain more friction between our heated bodies.

I slid down his body alittle more now, just until my mouth is on his nipple, making is hard as I run my tounge across it. He throws his head back into the pillow as he moans over and over again. I want to take him then as I hear his voice which was filling the silence in our room. I let go of the nipple that was currently in my mouth and move back up to his mouth. Our breaths mingle as we look into each other's eyes. Yet he's the one to break the silence now.

"Yuki, please. Don't tease anymore." He whispers out and that's all I need to hear from him before I move off to the side of our bed to fetch the lube that's sitting on our beside dresser. I move back inbetween his legs again, rised up on my own knees. I watch as his chest rises and falls heavy as I coat my fingers with lube. He watchs me do this and I can tell he's anxious now. He lifes his lower torso up slightly so that I have easier access to his hole. I circle my finger around his hole before plunging it inside of him. He cries out at the sudden invasion and I pause for a moment before I pull out slightly and drive it back in again. He's panting hard now as I add a second finger. He starts to slam back down onto my fingers as I push them inside of him. My member is throbbing now as I screw him with my fingers, wanting nothing more then to be screwing him with my member instead. I bit my lip and try to contain myself for a bit longer, knowing that if I don't I may ruin our moment. Though it's hard as he begs me to fuck him. I don't think I can take much more of this teasing, I want to be inside of him, I want to make him moan and cry out my name as I fuck him. That's all I need to know as I pull my fingers out and put a generous amount of lube onto my hand and stroke my member to coat it. I want to cum though as I am doing this and watching Shuichi as his hand begins to move of their own accord. What a sight for sore eyes.

I postion myself at his enterance and rub the tip of my swollen member against the hole that was begging to be fucked. He moans out again and tries to thrust down onto it. I comply and thrust into him, causing him to scream out into the dark of our bedroom. He grasps my shoulders tightly and I stay still as to let him adjust to the feeling. I didn't want to stop though, being inside of him, where it was tight and so hot, made me want to fuck him hard and fast to relieve the ache that was in my groin. He looks at me with hooded, lust filled eyes and nodds for me to continue now. That's all I need before I pull out and thrust back into him hard. He cries out over and over again as I thrust into him hard though not speeding up any. I want this to last, I want to be with him physically and emotionally for as long as possible. I knew that by morning things would go back to normal and I wanted this to last. This was our night.

He tries to flip me over, though to almost no avail, yet I comply and let him take over and lay back onto the bed as he sits on top of me. He postions my member at his enterance again and slams down onto it. It's my turn to moan out. He closes his eyes as he starts to thrust down at a faster, harder tempo. I hear him cry out as he shudders slightly as his sweet spot is hit. He starts to slam down harder as it's brushed again and again. I look down to see his own hard member neglected. I wrap a hand around it and begin to pump it in time with his thrusts. I rub a thumb over the slit where precum is coming from and I can tell he's close. I start to feel his walls clamp around my member and he lets out a scream as his shudders and comes over my hand and my stomache as well as his thighs. I'm not far behind, after watching such a sight I cum almost right after him, filling him with my own seed. He falls atop of me and lets out another shudder as he rides out the rest of his orgasim. I hug him close to my body and forget about all of our troubles for the moment, just enjoying the here and now.

I gently lay him next to me so I can go get a wash cloth to clean the both of us off before we sleep. I come back into our room and sit next to him on the bed, washing him off as best as I can first then myself, I put the wash cloth into the dirty laundry basket before climbing back into the bed beside Shuichi, pulling him flush against my body and close my eyes. He mumbles something to me and I barely catch what he says.

"I love you Yuki." I don't know what else to say to him so I kiss his head and tuck it underneath my own.

"I know." I whisper back and drift off to sleep.

__

Listen to your heart, mm-mmmmmm  


It had been almost a week now since the events with Shuichi happened. He had moved back in with his own family but still seemed to live here more then he did there. I heard another bang sound outside of my study room as the door shut. I opened my door to see who was there.

"Who's there?" I asked and then looked down to find a large battery laying on my ground. I kicked it over to find that Shuichi was in it. I sighed as he started to go all hyper on me again. "What are you doing?" He jumped over to the couch and sat down.

"With this costume they wont know it's me!" I roll my eyes at this. Where did he come up with this stuff?

"With you it's a good idea." I mumble, though I don't think he really notices.

He stops being so cheerful as he gives me a once over. "Eh? Yuki, you look like you lost some weight." Who'd have thought though that at times this kid would notice something so small?

"I've been busy finishing my novel." I say as an excuse, though it was part of the reason, there was another part that he didn't need to know about.

"Look, why did you come here? To waste my time?" I ask as I turn to leave.

"What? I can't come here to visit you?" He asks me, hurt laced into his voice. "What, after you said we were loves on t.v. Was it just a lie?" Was it a lie? Was I truely serious? Or did I just say it to get more fame? "I just.. I just wanted to see you. Hiro is quitting Bad luck because of K and crew."

"It's really just stupid." I say.

"I know, with what K and crew are saying-"

"I mean all of you." I say as I leave the room to go back into my study room, leaving nothing more to discuss. I thought about how his career was going though, at this rate I would have to take him to an amusement park, he was close to selling one million copies of his cd. I knew he was working hard to reach that goal if not for the fame then to have a date with me. Who'd thought that that one thing would motivate someone that much.

I met with Ayaka the next day to talk to her about Hiro. We talked about the arranged marriage that was suppose to happen between the two of us and I asked her to talk to Hiro and get him to reconsider quitting Bad Luck. As I drove back home though I wondered what had made me do it. Did I really care that much for Shuichi. It seemed that question always came along now a days.

When I arrived back at my apartment Tohma was there, waiting for me. I sighed and greeted him. We went inside my apartment room and sat on the couch. He turned on the t.v. to watch the interview that Shuichi had along with his band. I rolled my eyes as Hiro turned up half way through the interview and had told him that he would not be quitting Bad Luck after all. Just as I thought it couldn't get any worse Ryuichi had to show up and surprise that by saying that they had sold one million copies of their cd.. just what I needed to hear. Tohma laughed lightly as he turned the computer off and then turned serious eyes at me.

He started to talk again but everything seemed to be drowned out. My drink fell from my hands as I started to cough violently. Blood came up and I could hear Tohma ask me what's wrong. I think I passed out afterwards. All I could hear was a beeping sound when I awoke. I looked around to see my sister and Tohma by my side. How had I gotten here? Then I figured Tohma must have called the ambulance to come and get me. I sit up and she looks at me. She threw me a worried glance.

"So when everyone found out, they vomitted blood themselves, eh?" I smirked at her.

"Well I almost threw up!" I really do love to irritate the women. "Do you have any idea how shocked I was?" I almost laugh now.

"Could it be that you're worried?

"Of course I am! You're my brother!" She shouts at me. I look away and look out the window.

"Throwing up blood because of stress makes for a nice story, doesn't it? Since I'm a writer and all..."

"Stop it Eiri. Don't let this drag out any further. You should know what the cause of this is." I ignore her and just keep staring out the window. She goes on though. "Eiri, it'd be better if you and Shindou-kun weren't together. You still can write novels in America or Europe."

"Heh, how about New York? No matter how hard he tries, he wont follow me there. If the stress is of us being together, then that's best."

"I'm not saying that you have to completely seperate from Shindou-kun. But with your current condition, you should stay away from him for now."

"I suppose. I should break up with him, unexpectedly." I say, though somewhere deep down I really don't want to do that.

"Eiri-san, is this really alright with you?" Tohma finally speaks up after listening to my sister and I talk.

"Yeah." I say as I drop my head, feeling more guilty as I think about what I am going to do.

Everyone's gone now and it's dark in my room. I lay on the bed though, trying to fall back to sleep, if only these beds weren't so damn hard and uncomfortable. I hear the door opening and I wonder who it could be. Why would someone come so late at night to see me? One person comes to mind though as I think this. Shuichi. I hear footsteps come towards my bed and then they stop. I can feel his presence near my bed. He's so quiet though. Something I don't hear often when in his presence. The next thing I feel is his soft lips against mine. He stays like that for a moment before standing back up again. I hear him start to speak.

"I hate the fact that Yuki-chan will be leaving. I hate it even more that I'm the cause of his suffering. That's why..." he pauses for a moment and I decide that I should let him know that I am awake.

"That's why?" I hear him gasp in surprise as he looks down at me to see my eyes are opened and I have a small smile playing across my lips. I can tell he's nervous as he tries to cover it up.

"What? You were a-awake? You shoulda said s-something then..." he stutters out.

I sit up and start to speak. "Even now, you're to sympathetic with this harsh, pompous jerk." He stops mumbling nonsense and bows his head.

"I'm sorry." He says quietly.

"How boring. Maybe going to New York isn't such a bad idea." I look away from him as he gasps out in surprise again. He seems speechless now.

"If you want to go after all, I can't stop you. But.. But I..I'll die if you leave me behind here!" I look over at him again as he slams his fist down onto my bed. "Now matter how much stress I cause you, that won't cause you to die, right? But I will seriously die! Even though you throw up blood or have a hole punched through your stomache!" He slams his fist down on the bed again as he falls to his knees and sobs into his arms. Maybe it was best if I left, so I wouldn't cause some much trouble for both him and I. Even though I won't tell him this, I did love him. I feel bad for making him cry like this. I want to stop his tears, I don't want to see him like this anymore. I put a hand on his head.

"Don't be so serious." He looks up at me with tears still streaking down his cheeks. "When you're not simple and honest, it's quite boring. Besides, if you were the cause of this I wouldn't have had you around for so long." I give him a soft smile before I go on. "Besides, I owe you don't I? You sold one million copies of your cd, so it's a date then." he gives me a big smile and jumps up to hug me.

_I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye._

_  
_I left after our date was almost over. I don't think I could have said goodbye to him even if I tried. After telling Shuichi about _him_ I knew that I had to leave. I rested my head against the wall of the dirty apartment. This was the apartment room where _it_ had happened. Where my innocence was stolen from me. Where I had killed Kitazawa Yuki. It was painful to remember that night. I took out another cigarette from my pack and pulled out my lighter to find the picture that Shuichi and I had taken together at the amusement park on it. I flipped the lid and was about the lite my cigarette when a loud rumbling noise was heard. My eyes widdened as a figure jumped down from the ceiling and landed infront of me.. wearing a dog suit.

"Yuki, I found you!" I gasp out and let my cigarette fall out of my mouth as I look at him.

"Shu-Shuichi, what are you doing here?" How did you find me was more like it.

"I'm not letting you run away again Yuki. What happened was not your fault, stop blaming yourself!" He presses his lips to mine as my eyes had stayed widdened. It was amazing to see how much he surprised me each time

We headed back home afterwards in the helocoptor he had arrived in before. We were dropped off at his concert. He had laided right now stage with a boom while I hung back in the back rows of the stadium. I watched him sing his heart out to the crowd. I looked over to my side to see Ryuichi standing beside me, smiling.

"Shuichi is sparkling again. His sparkle is because of you Yuki-kun, don't forget that." He walked away before I could say anything, though I knew I wouldn't reply. It seemed he was right.

It was now a year and a half later since Shuichi and I had first met. Things are still about the same, though it was alittle rocky after, he had found out that I was writing lyrics for Nittle Grasper and had left. He didn't know though that the song was about him until it was performed. He had moved back in with his parents again. Though I didn't find out until Ryuichi came to ask me where he was. Tohma was the one who knew where he was, yet he said nothing to me. I was furious when I found out he had left. Ryuichi was the one who had brought him back, after talking some sense into the man. That reminded me, his birthday was coming up soon. I still had to get him a present. Heh. I could think of a few things I could give him as a gift.

I stepped out of my study room when I heard Shuichi enter our home. Yes our home, our home, our life, our love. He gave me a bright smile and I couldn't help but smile back as he gave me hug. It was amazing... someone like him had softened my heart and broke the walls down around it. I kissed the top of his head before heading to the kitchen.

"Shu-chan, what do you want for dinner tonight?" I feel arms wrap themselves around me and I smile again.

"Anything is fine koi1" He kisses my neck. I decide some take out is in order as I turn around, wrapping my arms around his waist as he moves his around to encirlce my neck. I kiss him passionately and he kisses back with as much passion. I think I'm happy with Shuichi. I think I can see my future with him in it. Little did he know that I had plans for us. I replayed everything in my head as I kissed the pink haired man infront of me. I broke away from him, out mouths still only inches away from one anothers. I let one arm slip away from his waist to go into my pocket to pull out a little case. I brought it up to his face so he could see it. He let go of me to take the case in his hands and open it. I waited for his reaction.. hoping I got the answer I was looking for. I search his face for what he was thinking. He turned bright violet eyes to me and smiled widely, tears falling down his cheeks and he jumped me, making both of us land on the floor, with me on the bottom and him ontop still hugging me. Still I wait for him to say his answer, wanting to hear it. He nuzzled my neck before speaking.

"Yes, Yuki-chan. I accept." That's all I need to hear before I pull his face to mine again and kiss him with everything I had. We had made love that night, it was filled with more passion and love then any of our times together. It had be.. perfect, so much like a dream. So when would this dream end and I would wake up to find that all of it didn't happen?

Fin

1Koi- well I would hope you know what this means. Love. 'tis the only Japanese word I used for now. I didn't want to spoil the fic by using too many japanese words in it.

**A/N:** And that's a rap... holy crap! This is probably one of my longest one shots I have ever written before... man am I proud of myself. I really hoped you all enjoyed this and thought it was pretty good for being my first Gravitation fic. I think this turned out fairly well.. it was one of those spur of the moments kind of thing. Just like to say that all quotes and what not was taken directly from either the anime or the manga. I had to to make sure I got the events right. So anyways, I hope you enjoyed reading this fic. I promise to revise it when I have time to fix mistakes and what not in this fic. Anyways, Ja ne everyone!

Love,

**fujinakaheero**


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